Hearts B 0
Clydebank 8
League (Lowland League)

Match Report

A lot of records have tumbled since Gordon Moffat became Clydebank manager in 2019, and tonight’s 8-0 hammering of the Hearts B team became the club’s largest away league victory, beating his own record of seven without reply at Kilwinning Rangers in 2023.

As well as a team record, Keir Samson has put himself in the frame for an individual accolade as he became just the third Bankies player to score back-to-back hat-tricks. If he can repeat that feat next week at Albion Rovers, he will become the first player for the club to record three consecutive hat-tricks.

Darian MacKinnon almost got there in 2012, missing out by a single goal when he scored eight in three games. Further back, Tommy Coyne almost completed three consecutive league hat-tricks in 1983, but he missed a penalty against Morton in a 3-3 draw. There was a cup game sandwiched in between his goal-scoring exploits in the league, so it was always only ever going to be two in a row.

Before we talk about the Bankies performance, it was a chastening experience for the young Hearts B team who were taught a harsh lesson tonight. If any of these young players are to carve out a career in professional football, then this is the type of adversity that should stand them in good stead. One or two of the wee Jambos found it hard to take and Taylor Hogarth’s red card was probably borne out of that frustration.

It also raises questions about the validity of B teams being in this league in the first place. Only five of the team who started in the 2-2 draw at Holm Park earlier in the season were in the eleven for this game, with a large number of the squad out on loan at other league clubs. This huge variance in the quality of the sides that B teams field from match to match creates unfairness and makes a mockery of the competition. It seems likely that this experiment will come to an end this season, and rightly so.

So, is it on? Are we even allowed to say it? Words are really hard to come by to describe how well Clydebank have played in recent weeks. Nineteen goals in three games is nothing short of phenomenal stuff. I have to admit I thought that our goose was well and truly cooked after the defeat by Celtic B in the middle of February, but the reversal in fortunes has been remarkable.

As referenced before, the signing of Dom Docherty has been pivotal. It’s not like he is Lionel Messi or anything as extreme as that, but he has proven to be the exact fit for the missing piece in the puzzle. We look a completely different attacking proposition. Dean Cairns, freed from the shackles of much of his defensive responsibilities, has been a different player, and the system that Moffat has been deploying has benefitted almost every player on the field at any given time.

This game turned out to be a one-sided mismatch, but you can only play what is in front of you, as the saying goes. This was the fourth time that the Bankies have won three consecutive league games, but it was the first time they’ve managed to extend the run to four.

The intensity and purpose on and off the ball has been superb in recent weeks. It has been a joy to watch, and is the front-foot style of play that most supporters want to see.

The score read eight but easily could have been more. Both Neil McLaughlin and Nicky Little could have had hat-tricks, which would have broken another record had it transpired. Only once have Clydebank had two hat-tricks in the same game, and that was against Arbroath almost 50 years ago in 1977 when Davie Cooper (3) and Joe McCallan (4) both achieved this feat in what was a record 8-1 victory at the time.

The quality of the goals was one of the most pleasing aspects of the performance. Owen Wardell scored the first and the sixth goals with stunning top-corner strikes, and Neil McLaughlin waltzed his way through the defence to pass the ball into the net for goal number three. In between came Keir Samson’s hat-trick: a delightful first-time shot on his left foot when the ball dropped out of the sky, and two headers, the second of which was the culmination of a fantastic move involving Low and McHugh.

Nicky Little came off the bench to score from the spot after Lee Gallacher was brought down in the box, and he neatly headed home at the back post from another McHugh cross. It should be noted that last night was Nicky’s 340th appearance for the club, and he recently overtook Mike Larnach to move into fifth position in the all-time appearances list.

To answer the question, is it on? Well, I suppose it is, but we still need favours. In the back of my mind I get the nagging feeling we maybe lost just one game too many during our bad run of form. Yes, we have closed the gap on Bonnyrigg to two points, but Linlithgow and Tranent can still overtake us if they win their games in hand.

There is an outcome where everything works out and we go on to win the league, but the situation is so tight between the top four that there are a myriad of other eventualities where we don’t. All we can do is maintain these recent high standards and win as many games as possible between now and the end of the season, and if the title doesn’t come to Holm Park, we’ll at least know the eventual champions had to fight all the way to keep it from us.

Match report written by Stuart McBay